
18
THE
PERSONAL
HISTORY
AND
EXPERIENCE
The toast was received with great applause, and such hearty laughter that
it made me laugh too; at which they laughed the more. In short, we
quite enjoyed ourselves.
We walked about on the cliff after that, and sat on the grass, and
looked at things through a telescope-I could make out nothing myself
when it was put to my eye, but
I
pretended
I
could-and then we came
back to the hotel to an early dinner. All the time we were out, the two
gentlemen smoked incessantly-which,
I
thought, if
I
might judge from the
smell of their roughcoats, they must have been doing, ever since the
coatshad
first come home from the tailor's.
I
must not forget that we went on
board the yacht, where they all three descended into the cabin, and were busy
with some papers.
I
saw them quite hard at work, when
I
looked down
through the open skylight. They left me, during this time, with a very nice
man with a very large head of red hair and a very small shiny hat upon it,
who had got a cross-barred shirt or waistcoat on, with
"
Skylark
"
in capital
letters across the chest.
I
thought it was his name; and that as he lived
on board ship and hadn't a street-door to put his name on, he put it
there instead; but when
I
called him Mr. Skylark, he said it meant the
vessel.
I
observed all day that Mr. Murdstone was graver and steadier than the
two gentlemen. They were very gay and careless.
They joked freely with
one another, but seldom with him. It appeared to me that he was more
clever and cold than they were, and that they regarded him with some-
thing of my own feeling.
I
remarked that once or twice when Mr.
Quinion was talking, he looked at Mr. Murdstone sideways, as if to make
sure of his not being displeased
;
and that once when Mr. Passnidge (the
other gentleman) was in high spirits, he trod upon his foot, and gave him
a secret caution with his eyes, to observe Mr.
&!turdstone, who was sitting
stern and silent. Nor do
I
recollect that Mr. Murdstone laughed at all
that day, except at the Sheffield joke-and that, by the by, was his
own.
MTe went home early in the evening. It was a very fine evening, and
my mother and he had another stroll by the sweet-briar, while
I
was sent
in to get my tea, When he was gone, my mother asked me all about the
day
I
had had, and what they had said and done.
I
mentioned what they
had said about her, and she laughed, and told me they were impudent
fellows who talked nonsense-but
I
knew it pleased her.
I
knew it quite
as
well as
I
know it now.
I
took the opportunity of asking if she was
at all acquainted with
Nr. Brooks of Sheffield, but she answered
No, only she supposed he must be a manufacturer in the knife and fork
way.
Can
I
say of her face-altered as
I
have reason to remember it,
perished as
I
know it is-that it is gone, when here it comes before me at
this instant, as distinct as any face that
I
may choose to look on in a
crowded street? Can
I
say of her innocent and girlish beauty, that it
faded, and was no more, when its breath falls on my cheek now, as it fell
that night
?
Can
I
say she ever changed, when my remembrance brings
her back to life, thus only
;
and, truer to its loving youth than
I
have been,
or man ever is, still holds fast what it cherished then?